The Cullens In Konoha
by emmett-uzumaki
Summary: When the Cullens realise people have noticed they're not aging, Alice has a vision that guides them to their new home: Konoha! Set during Shippuuden for Naruto and 5 years after Breaking Dawn for Twilight. Humor.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N Hello! We are Mr. Uchimaki and Mariam.**

**Mariam: Do I HAVE to be called that?!**

**Mr. Uchimaki: Of course! It's your nickname, and it has been ever since… well… a while! Anyway, a few days ago I was thinking "Hey, how cool would it be to have a Naruto/Twilight crossover! After a while, I had heaps of ideas!! Then I met up with Mariam and we started talking about it, and now, here we are, writing it!!**

**Mariam: As I know virtually nothing of Naruto, and a lot about Twilight I will be mostly writing the Twilight related parts of this fanfic.**

**Mr. Uchimaki: I don't actually know too much about Naruto, but I have to say I know a lot more about it than Mariam does, plus I have a friend who knows almost everything, therefore, I will be writing the more Naruto related subjects (with the help of Kingyo XD)**

**Mariam: So… enjoy!**

**Oh, and we don't own Twilight or Naruto. **

**Carlisle POV:**

I didn't need Edward's talent to know that the humans were getting suspicious, but I suppose it was only natural.

We'd been in Forks for nearly 8 years now – the longest we'd ever stayed in the one location. It would be hard for us to leave; we'd all grown attached. It was overcast here so often that it was almost easy for us to blend in. I'd been considering the idea of moving a lot, of late. But where would we go? Also, there was the issue of Jacob. He was so attached to Renesmee now; surely he'd have to come with us. A family with five adopted teenagers was suspicious enough, let alone a family with _eight._

I sighed. It was getting near the end of my shift at Fork's small hospital.

It felt almost criminal to go home at nights for un-needed sleep.

I could do so much more for my patients in those extra hours!

But my family was probably missing me. Come to think of it, it'd been weeks since Esme and I had-

My musings were interrupted by the shrill ringing of my new cell phone; I picked it up and held it to my ear at vampire speed, not bothering to check if anyone was watching.

"Carlisle, I had a vision."

"Alice."

"Can you come home? I'd rather tell you in person," she said.

"It's that important?" I was beginning to worry now. Were the Volturi coming back? No. She didn't _sound_ worried or upset. Come to think of it, she sounded like she'd just won the lottery.

"Yes. Definitely important!"

"Ok, I'll come back. It's getting near the end of my shift anyway."

Sighing again, I dropped the phone back on my desk. In my peripheral vision, I caught the movement of my fellow employees.

Gossiping, perhaps?

Normally, I wouldn't listen to their whispers , but because I'd recently been thinking about the rumors about my family that were surely buzzing around the place by now, I just had to know what they were talking about.

"I wonder what _that_ was about?" Said Samuel Beaver, one of the younger surgeons.

"Probably talking to some of his fellow aliens," replied his older brother, Daniel.

Aliens? Well, it wouldn't be the first time.

"Yeah… like the daleks!"

The Beaver brothers were known for their supposed "nerdiness". I wasn't surprised to hear this.

"Doctor who?" scoffed Daniel.

"No… they're probably evil frogs in disguise, waiting for the right moment to eat us."

Samuel nodded appreciatedly.

_What?!_

"That would explain the size of that Edward kid's eyebrows."

Daniel laughed in whispers.

"Definitely. When I first saw him, I could swear…"

I stopped listening after that.

However interesting the conversation was, it wasn't right to eavsdrop once they stopped discussing the new rumors on the Cullen family.

I picked up my glasses – a prop to make me look more intelligent and stop the female hospital staff ogling me – and left the hospital.

I got into my black mercedes and headed home at full speed.

As the green forest flashed by my car windows, I pondered this new information. They thought we were _frogs?!_

Well, that was certainly something new.

Was there a new block buster movie out about evil frogs? I made a mental note to check what movies were playing in Port Angeles. And… to discuss the topic of moving as soon as possible.

Due to my crazy driving – something all vampires were known for – I was home within 10 minutes.

I didn't bother to take the car to the garage; instead, I flashed into the house at my full speed, not even bothering to lock the car door.

I definitely didn't expect to see what I saw when I got inside.

If Alice's vision was of such great importance, then shouldn't everyone be waiting for my arrival?

Had something happened?

The whole first floor was empty.

I could hear them all, doing their various activities.

Edward and Bella were hunting nearby with Renesmee.

Rosalie was upstairs, most likely admiring herself.

Emmett and Jasper were… arm wrestling, by the sounds of it.

I could hear the ruffling of pages, so I asumed Esme or Alice was reading. Hmm.

"Alice?" I called.

She was by my side in an instant, literally twitching from excitement.

"Carlisle!" She squealed.

"I'm so, so, _so_ glad you're here! No one seems to think this is important at all, but, cleary, it _is_. Infact, I think it's one of the most important things I've _ever_ seen. And, it's perfect timing, too! I mean, everyone was getting suspicious. _Look_ at you, pretending to be thirty- _eight_! Oh, this is so exciting!" Cleary, she was looking forward to her vision – whatever it was.

"Would you please enlighten me? I'm clueless as to what you're talking about…"

She sighed. "Fine. I _was_ going to surprise you, but I guess not…"

"Well?"

"We're moving to Japan!"

**Sasuke's POV**

I scowled into the darkness.

_This is a bad idea. Should I turn back? No, I don't have anywhere else to go._

It'd been almost four years since I saw them… since I saw _her_.

_She might not even like me anymore, since I broke her heart when I left the village. What if she's fallen for Naruto?_

"No, that's not even possible," I said to myself while smirking a bit. It would be interesting to see Naruto again, I had to admit I did miss him a little.

_But what if he hates me too?_

I decided to stop thinking about them and started to take notice of my surrondings. Since it was late at night –or possibly early in the morning- the trees and grass around me were an ugly dark green colour. It was difficult to see the navy blue sky through the leaves, but I was able to see a few stars. Nothing special.

I kept walking for a few more hours until I saw a cherry blossum tree infront of me. I was finding it hard not to think about Sakura, but now it was impossible. I decided to rest for a bit under the tree, allowing myself to remember:

When I first made the decision to leave the village, I thought that power was the most important thing; I wanted revenge more than anything. That evil bastard! How could he have killed his own _family_? What the _hell_ was he thinking?

I was just about to leave when I was interrupted by… _her_. She said she'd do anything for me, but my heart had already made a decision. During my time training under Orochimaru's care, I began to miss her a lot more than I thought I would. At first I tried to ignore these feelings, but they just got worse. Eventually I gave up on my revenge –obviously- and I came to this decision: I was coming back.

**A/N: Mariam: We'll try to make the chapters longer in the future… it's just that this was the introduction and we're really excited about posting it! (^_^)**

**Mr. Uchimaki: That was SO hard! I was so nervous about Sasuke not being in character!! I'm obviously a terrible writer, please don't insult my writing, this is my first fan fiction!!!!!**

**Mariam: *sigh* such a pessimist… I apologize for any spelling mistakes as this computer has **_**no**_** spell checker. Anywayz, I hoped you enjoyed it! Please review, but no flames!!!!!!!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: "Mr Uchimaki" had to leave before we got to post this chapter, and, to save time, we skipped over the author's note and went straight to business XD So, I would like to thank sakura1289, namikage bushin, TanyaUchia, Abhorsen12, origamishishou, and RedEmber018 for reviewing! Also, to anyone who favourited and anyone who reviewed that I missed.**

**We don't own Twilight or Naruto.**

**Jacob's POV:**

"Would you like a beverage?" The stupid airhostess asked. All throughout the flight she'd been bothering me constantly with her questions. Just me. Not any of those damn bloodsuckers. Carlisle claimed it was because, out of the ten of us, I was the most approachable. Now _that_ was something new... I remembered that morning about – I think – four years ago when I stupidly went to Bella's school – a "safe" place to give Edward that stupid warning, a place with witnesses. People avoided me, nervously glancing in my direction before cowering away. I was scary to them, dangerous. Grumbling curse words, I rested my stupid left arm on the stupid armrest and gazed out the stupid window onto the stupid Atlantic Ocean. Naturally, her presence put me in a bad mood. _Everything _was stupid. Maybe if I ignored her, she would leave me the hell alone. Renesmee, now resembling a 15 year old, despite the fact that she was only 5, snuggled closer into my shoulder. In just a few years I would be allowed to – never mind. I immediately cut off that thought when I remembered that Edward, her stupid father, and Bella, her stupid mother, were sitting directly behind me.

It'd taken nearly three stupid weeks to persuade Billy to let me go with the rest of them to stupid Japan. I mean, he'd let me run off on my own, hadn't he? Why was this any different? Stupid Billy...

"Ok, well… would you like a pillow?" Ugh. Maybe the ignoring thing wasn't going to work after all. I turned to glare at her, careful not to jostle Nessie too much.

"No." I said a little vehemently.

"Thankyou…" I tacked on the end when I noticed her slightly baffled expression.

Then, at last, she walked back down the stupid isle to go bother some other poor passenger. Wow, but she looked _hot _from behind; I think I drooled a little. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edward roll his eyes. Clamping my mouth shut, I turned back in my seat. The sun was just starting to set, and I had to admit, I was a little tired… ok, exhausted. Maybe I should've taken up the airhostess' pillow offer. As I started to nod off, I let my mind skim over the past weeks events:

After Alice had first revealed what this "super important" vision of hers was, everyone had noticeably scoffed and rolled their eyes. _Japan?_ As If. I didn't think anyone here even _spoke _Japanese.

"I do," Edward cut in.

"Me too!" Alice replied.

Ok, so what if someone- two someones – did? That was two out of ten. There was no way we could get around with out making fools out of ourselves. With a stab of total embarrassment I realized that everyone – but me – could probably learn the damn language with one flip through the dictionary. Stupid photographic memories… On another note, it wasn't like Japan was especially cloudy. Honestly, I was still having doubts about how this was gonna turn out.

So, Carlisle'd quit his job at the hospital within a few hours and we were all set to go. It was strange how much everyone relied on Alice's visions and Carlisle's obvious authority. Everyone treated this whole trip/ move as if it was nothing but relocation to another town in the Northern US. Did they even realise that we were going overseas? To Asia? Their scarily pale skin would be especially noticeable there.

There was another problem: Billy. As I said before, he wasn't happy about me venturing overseas with eight and a half vampires. Hmmn…

As I started losing consciousness, pictures of that hot air hostess filled my mind. Nessie was soon to join her… Ahhh. What a great mental image. I felt someone kick my comfortable first class seat.

"What?" I asked groggily, turning around to a murderously angry looking Edward. Oh. My cheeks were tinged with light pink as I focused my gaze on the now fascinating, uber sexy, green, box of tissues resting on Bella's lap. Why did she even have it there? Weren't vampires supposed to never get sick?

**Naruto's POV:**

_Slurrp! Slurrp! _

"Is that any good?" Iruka asked; his mouth was still half full with his own ramen.

I was so hungry; I couldn't stop eating to reply. I was sure he'd get the picture anyway.

"I'll take that as a yes…" he muttered.

After about three minutes of nothing but greedy slurping, I finished my ramen.

"Thank you, Iruka sensei!" I patted my stomach as we both walked away from the bar. The sun was setting, so it was difficult to make out the colour of the purple Ichiraku ramen shop. The usually pale gravel was darkened by the lack of light.

"Don't mention it," he replied cheerfully. "Besides, you looked pretty hungry."

"Yeah, training was tough today!" I said as my eyes drifted to Sakura running towards us at full speed with an absolutely ecstatic face. She looked pretty worn out, since we had been training for hours a little while before. I figured the reason why she was running so fast must have been important.

"Naruto! You'll never believe who's here!!!" She was so happy, she was even crying.

"What? Who's here, Sakura chan?" I asked her curiously.

Iruka started chuckling and shaking his head.

"What's going on?" I was getting really confused now.

Sakura sighed exasperatedly. "Idiot! It's Sasuke kun! Sasuke kun came back!" she squealed.

I froze instantly.

_Sasuke? _I grinned.

**Jacob's POV:**

We landed at Osaka airport at around dawn. It was like nothing I'd ever seen before. The ceiling was very, very, _very _high, with large, curved, grey beams that stretched right down the window, which, like at the Cullen's house, was actually an entire wall made of glass. It also curved inwards a little. I felt as if we were in a massive, grey tunnel. The chairs in each of the waiting areas were very brightly coloured; blue, red, yellow. Bright green ferns in pots were scattered along the wall opposite the window. I couldn't help but compare it to the Sea Tac airport, which looked sort of like a hospital.

Alice, being Alice, went straight to the gift shop. I didn't even bother to look at any one of her purchased items in the ten or so paper shopping bags she carried when we walked out of the automatic doors at the airport entrance. I heard her chattering away to a very bored looking Bella about Japan's shopping possibilities. Laughing to myself, I wrapped my arm around Nessie's waist, ignoring the irritated looks coming from Edward.

"So, what do ya think, Ness?"

She looked up at me with those big, beautiful brown eyes and laughed a bit at my overly curious expression.

"Well, we've only just arrived, Jake."

"Oh. Right," I let my eyes drift to my surroundings. We were currently walking through an enormous car park, with some very fluorescent looking vehicles. The place seemed deserted of all vegetation, which looked very odd to me considering the amount of time I spent in the woods. Carlisle and Esme led the way to a blood red Toyota Yaris; it didn't look like we'd all fit inside.

"Well Jacob-" began Carlisle.

"No!" Edward growled, cutting him off. I'd bet all my lifetime savings that the vampire doctor was thinking of Renesmee riding in it with me. I knew that Edward didn't _really _have a problem with Nessie and I… it was just that, until recently, I'd never thought of her that way. It would probably take some time for him to get used to it – though listening to my pretty perverted thoughts about her probably wouldn't help the situation.

Edward, visibly fuming went to pull Renesmee from my arms. Bella audibly sighed, probably rolling her eyes at his extreme behaviour. Yep. It was definitely the latter. Rosalie looked so smug; I wanted to rip all of her shiny, blond hair out.

"I _was _going to suggest that Jacob and Nessie ride this across the bridge…" Carlisle trailed off.

"Fine," I said grudgingly.

"I'll go alone."

The Osaka airport was located a few miles out to sea; it was joined to the main land by a very modern looking bridge. As I drove the very tacky – at least in my opinion – car along it, I tried to catch a glimpse of any one of the eight – and a half- vampires swimming through the ocean. It was all very confusing; I thought that they wanted to be _human. _To top it off, we were going to travel to our new home on foot. And it wasn't even in this city.

**Sakura's POV:**

_This is great! I don't think I've ever felt so happy! _

Thoughts like this went through my head as I walked with Naruto and Sasuke once again. To be honest, I had given up on Sasuke ever coming back. He never seemed like he even _liked _anyone in Konoha. So why did he come back? _Maybe he'll tell us when Kakashi is here, too._

"It's getting late… I'm gonna head off," Naruto said, grinning. He was right, it was late. We had been walking around and talking for at least two hours now, and it was difficult to see anything when the clouds were covering the full moon like this.

"Alright, See ya, Naruto," I replied. I had to admit, I was sort of happy to get rid of him. Now Sasuke and I could have some alone time! But it was likely that he'd leave now, too…

"Hey, Sakura… have you eaten yet?" Sasuke asked in his beautiful voice. My heart skipped a beat as I took in what he said.

_Wait? Did he just ask if I've had anything to eat? Maybe he'll ask me out on a date! Make sure you don't sound like a love-struck idiot when you reply, Sakura!_

"Uhh… No… Why do you ask?" I felt my face heating up and my heart beating faster.

Sasuke stopped near a lamppost, and I was able to see his face was slightly redder and more uncomfortable looking than usual.

"You… Uhh… you wanna get something to eat?" Sasuke asked looking towards the dark gravel.

"Sure!" I replied cheerfully.

Coincidently, we were right next to the Ichiraku ramen bar, so we sat down and ordered.

_I'm really hungry, so should I get something big? No, then I might seem like a fatty… but if I get something small I'll seem desperate… and there isn't much to get that's a medium size… No, it's good to be honest, so I'll get something big. Should I get chicken or pork? Chicken is too light, but pork is what Naruto usually gets, and then it might seem like I'm in love with him… But I prefer chicken anyway, so should I get that? Yes, I'll get chicken ramen!_

"Have you decided yet?" Sasuke had a smirk across his face as I noticed he had already ordered and got his food.

_Oh no! He ended up getting chicken ramen! If I get that as well, I'll seem like I'm copying him! Um… I could get the pork ramen-_

Sasuke interrupted my thoughts:

"Uhh… Sakura… There's something I wanna talk about… The reason that I came back… It's… umm…"

_Oh my god! Is this really happening? I've never seen Sasuke kun's face so red! Is he confessing? Oh my god! I've never been so- hey, who's that really good-looking guy?_

I looked behind one of the curtains to see _the hottest _being on Earth. He was tall, with unruly bronze hair and was actually _smiling _at me. Or was it a smirk? No… he was so smiling! Suddenly, Sasuke disappeared in a puff of smoke. Well… not really, but to me, he did. This new guy was definitely the best looking guy in the world, despite his unnaturally pale skin. And his eyes! Oh, his eyes were the most exotic, seductive eyes I'd ever seen; beautiful golden orbs…

**A/N: Well I'm afraid that's it for this chapter, but don't worry, we're planning on writing more tomorrow. ******


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:**

**Mr. Uchimaki: WE ARE SOOOOOOOOO SORRY!!!!!!!! WE WANTED TO WRITE MORE (well, I'm sort of speaking for myself, I'm not sure how my writing partner feels about this) BUT** **SCHOOL AND FRIENDS AND STUFF GOT IN THE WAY!!!! Anyway, the holidays are coming up, and we will write HEAPS!**

**Mariam: We will? Ok… Here is the next (tiny, tiny, tiny) chapter**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight or Naruto.**

**Last chapter:**

_I looked behind one of the curtains to see the hottest being on Earth. He was tall, with unruly bronze hair and was actually smiling at me. Or was it a smirk? No… he was so smiling! Suddenly, Sasuke disappeared in a puff of smoke. Well… not really, but to me, he did. This new guy was definitely the best looking guy in the world, despite his unnaturally pale skin. And his eyes! Oh, his eyes were the most exotic, seductive eyes I'd ever seen; beautiful golden orbs…_

**Sasuke's POV:**

"Sakura..? Hello…?"

She wasn't paying any attention to me. I was about to confess to her, and she wasn't paying any attention at all!

_What is she looking at anyway?_

I followed Sakura's gaze and my mouth dropped. I frowned deeply, probably visibly fuming. Grrr.

"Ah… w-wh…" Was all that escaped my mouth.

Sakura was practically ogling at some deathly pale guy standing about 5 meters to our right. Seriously. He looked like a dead person, only… alive. There are no adjectives that describe how strange he was… yet, not strange. I could halfway understand why Sakura had taken such an interest. Ok. Only a small amount of my brain could rationally take in the situation, but it was overruled by the part of me that was just… angry. More than angry. Furious. Sakura was so excited to see me return; why, at the most inconvenient moment – just as I was about to confess my new found love for her – had _he_ showed his… his… annoyingly perfect face. Argh.

_Wait a minute, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions. I mean, she could be staring at him because she thinks he's hideous! Maybe I still have a chance! Yes! I'll finish eating, walk her home, ask if I can come in, go into her room and… Oh, yesssss! But is that too forward on a first date? Well, she has loved me for about three years, so she should be happy with it! I mean, I have a nice face; a nice body. I'm farrrr better looking than him. And I'm sure my wiener_ _is probably bigger._

My train of thought was rudely interrupted by a dark chuckle. _How dar-_ Oh. It was _it._ Automatically, I turned to glare -- after all, that wasn't an immensely uncommon occurrence for me; I always glared at people for no reason.

"I'm not hungry anymore," Sakura said rather distantly, as she was still ogling _it_. "See you later…"

And with that she walked off, no, not "off", to _it_. How could she? I'd never seen this _heartless _side to her! I decided to go home; it would be embarrassing to stay here by myself waiting for her.

As I walked out, I saw her trying to get _it's _attention. Flicking her short, pink, luxurious hair, clearing her throat slightly so you could almost hear that angelic voice of hers. She had broken my heart, but I could still admire her from afar anyway.

_It_ didn't seem at all interested in her; he had another girl wrapped around his arm. She looked somewhat similar to _it; _the same pale skin, the same unnatural beauty… But her hair was brown, and of course, she was female.

There were a lot of other strange, similar people around them, with the exception of one muscular, dark skinned man, who looked about twenty five. He shifted his eyes about the place guilty, as if their presence in the village were his fault, because, clearly they didn't mean to come here.

Also, I noticed that the girl holding hands with him looked slightly more human than the rest. Other than that, I really couldn't take them in; I was too focused on the pain of rejection. All I could think was: "Who are these people?"

Unfortunately, my house was in the direction that they were drifting in, so I walked past them as fast as I could. I took one last glare at _it_ to see he was smirking at me, as if I were amusing to him. Once I got round the corner, I bounded into my house and threw my forehead protector at the window. As I watched it smash, I felt like it wasn't the window, but my heart smashing into millions of delicate pieces. I lay on my bed and tried to sleep…

I woke up after about three hours sleep. I got out of bed, and before I even had I chance to take a step, I heard an annoying knocking sound coming from the door. I guessed it was probably Naruto; no one else could make such simple knocking on a door so terribly irritating.

I opened the door. Yep, it was Naruto.

"_What?!_" I almost growled at him. I didn't expect that he'd be surprised, though; I was usually like this in his presence. His brow furrowed slightly in concern, but it didn't last very long before his usual happy grin dominated his face. Wow. I must've sounded pretty bad. Whatever…

"Team Seven has to go see Tsunade. It looks like we have a mission!" Naruto was as excited as ever; he was always like this when we got a mission before, but I half expected him to have grown up a bit. Obviously, I was wrong.

"Team Seven… as in… with Sakura?" I didn't think I'd be able to see her again.

"Yeah.. By the way, how was the date?" Naruto looked slightly irritated; I figured he still had a crush on Sakura.

"I don't wanna talk about it, wait here." I shut the door and got ready, but it took me a lot longer than usual since I was under so much stress.

"Oi, Sasuke! Hurry up!" Stupid Naruto was being impatient. He really hadn't changed a bit.

After another ten minutes or so I got out of the house and locked the door, making sure Naruto didn't see the glass shattered on the floor.

"So, tell me about this mission," I said in a monotone as we began walking. _I might as well get this mission over and done with so I can lock myself up in my room for a few days._ _Maybe if I act drastically enough, Sakura will get worried about me and forget about _it. _I could pretend to jump of a cliff or something—_

My thoughts were interrupted by Naruto's voice.

"All we have to do is show some people around the village; there're about ten of them, so it'll take a while."

_Ten? Weren't there about ten of those weird people standing with _it_?_

"Have you met them yet?"

Naruto's excited expression dropped, "No…"

"Damn…"

We walked in silence for the rest of the trip to the Hokage Mansion. When we entered Tsunade's office, Sakura was already standing there. She looked so beautiful today; her face was glowing. She wasn't wearing her usual ninja clothes, instead she had a casual outfit on. It consisted of blue skinny jeans, and a plain, tight-fitting, pink t-shirt. Just looking at her made my heart ache, so I turned away, instead to glare angrily at the wall behind me.

"Sorry about ditching you yesterday, Sasuke." Sakura sounded apologetic.

"Whatever," I mumbled, still staring at the wall.

"It's nice to see you finally returned, Sasuke," Tsunade said, interrupting our conversation. "I'm sure Naruto has filled you in on the mission."

"Yeah."

"The Cullens are waiting at Ichiraku. I think it would be easier if you split up into groups. These people are from America, so we want to make a good impression." Tsunade took a swig of sake after her sentence.

"Yeah, I'm sure a drunk old lady as the Hokage will give a great impression." Naruto mummered rudely.

"What was that?!" Tsunade growled. Most people, including Naruto, would have been terrified of this attitude.

"Nothing.. Nothing.." Naruto saved himself.

"We should be going now." Sakura said as she headed towards the door. Naruto and I followed.

"I'm hungry," muttered Jacob, patting his growling stomach somewhat affectionately, murmuring unintelligible sweet phrases to it.

It was around midday, big, ominous clouds quickly moving in to dominant the perfect, azure blue sky. Our vampires would be safe for this one afternoon. They were all waiting around in the shade for their 'tour guides' to show up. Jacob hadn't eaten a thing since he was on the plane, an almost impossible feat for a werewolf.

"Here!" Renesmee exclaimed excitedly, getting up from her spot on one of the three grey rocks the Cullens were currently resting on, and handing him some chicken sushi. She'd been musing over all of his possible reactions to it all day long, and now seemed like a good time to see which one would win.

Jacob made a face, "What in the ducks who screech at people is _that?!_" He sniffed it curiously, before snatching it out of Nessie's small palm. "_Seaweed?!_ When I said I was hungry, I really meant that I specifically wanted a three decked sandwich, one layer with ham and mustard, the next with deep fried catfish – all of the whiskers cut off – and soy sauce, and the final layer with 5 pieces of bacon, and French cheese."

After he'd finished his rant, Jacob threw the sushi to the ground furiously, and began to repetitively stomp on it. Nessie's face fell slightly, and she turned away from the wolf boy, muttering, "Good God…"

"Geez, mutt. Are you _pregnant_ or something? Just eat the damn food," said Rosalie scornfully, flipping her long, blonde hair behind her shoulder.

"B-but it's _seaweed_…" Jacob wailed adorably.

Bella detangled herself from Edward and patted him on the back, "It's Ok. I didn't have much tolerance for sushi when I was human either. And besides, I'm sure our tour group will provide us with food, anyway." She wrinkled her nose a little at the thought of having to swallow human food.

Right on que, Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura all showed up.

"You must be the tour guides," Bella said in Japanese, so Team 7 could understand.

"What? They're just a bunch of kids!" Jacob exclaimed angrily in English. Naruto flinched a bit, knowing that whatever he said must have been rude.

Renesmee was quick to translate to the ninjas.

"Why you--!" Naruto was about to go for Jacob, but was stopped by Sasuke, who was glaring at Edward…

"Let me introduce ourselves!" Alice perked up, rushing forward to greet them. "I'm Alice." She said, smiling. She turned her pixie head to the couple making out in the shade under the tree. "That's Emmett and Rosalie…" She gestured toward everyone else and introduced them accordingly, "Edward, Bella, Jacob, Renesmee." Smiling fondly at the tall, leonine, blonde, "And this is my lover, Jasper. Carlisle and Esme seem to have gone off… Anyway, it's nice to meet you. By the way, Jacob doesn't speak Japanese, incase you were wondering."

The girl with the pink hair stepped forward to introduce her group:

"I'm Haruno Sakura, this is Uchiha Sasuke and Uzumaki Naruto," Sakura said with a polite smile. "It's nice to meet you too."

"We'll be showing you around Konohagakure," Sasuke said coldly, glaring daggers at Edward.

~ ^/-\^ ~

"This is the hospital," Sakura said, pointing to a large building with lots of big windows. Sasuke had been glaring at Edward the whole time, and hadn't really been much use on the mission. Naruto pointed out a few things, but mainly tried to give a good impression towards Renesmee, much to Jacobs frustration. Naruto was taking quite a liking to the young half vampire. Really, the only one doing any work was Sakura, but even she was just trying to make a good impression on Edward. She would also occasionally glare at Bella.

All through the afternoon I followed them through the familiar village, until eventually I grew bored and went back to gathering acorns for my ever growing collection under Kiba's pillow.

~ ^/-\^ ~

Jacob's POV:

That stupid blonde in the orange suit was crushing on Renesmee. I mean, he was hitting on her _all afternoon_.

"Stop exaggerating, Jake." Edward murmured from behind me. "At the moment, he's just thinking about how beautiful she is. Nothing more."

_Pffft. _As if. But I wasn't going to wast my time arguing with Edward; I needed to keep a close eye on pumpkin guy.

As the pink haired chick rambled on in Japanese about some building which looked like three giant mushrooms in the shape of Mickey Mouse, I watched Nessie closely for signs that she liked him too.

Because she was a genuinely kind person – well, vampire-human – she was letting him talk in her ear as he excitedly pointed to some carvings of faces in the ridge above the Mickey Mouse Mushroom mansion. But I thought that she looked a bit _too_ interested as she chatted animatedly with him about something. For the billionth time since we arrived here, I wish I spoke that language.

"Hey, Edward…" I said slowly, tapping him on the shoulder. He turned to me and raised one eyebrow as he read what I was thinking.


End file.
